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03-27-2012 So maybe I'm simple. There are worse things in life. To be, and to be called. And trust me, I've been called worse. But in life, it's good to enjoy the simple things. You have to, or you'll go crazy. Or there's another option, I suppose - create big things to get excited about. But you'll probably run out of money trying to do that. Thus, simple thing #1 that I enjoy: Credit card readers that accept your card with the stripe facing right or left. This is guaranteed to put a smile on my face. There is a Mobil station in town that I frequent where all the gas pumps have credit card readers that will accept your credit card facing either direction. This is wonderful. Why on earth can't more places employ this technology? The alternative is this: me trying to stick the card in the wrong way, then trying to figure out which way the sign is actually telling me to put the card in, invariably fumbling with my credit card and wallet, nearly dropping both, and feeling like a complete dumbass for your choice of those reasons.  I love signs like these! Simple thing #2 that I will enjoy: Less soccer. The US tied (Woooo, ties!) a soccer match yesterday against El Salvador, which ended their hopes of a bid in the 2012 Olympics. Maybe this is dick-ish of me, but the less soccer and soccer "highlights" I'm subjected to, the happier I am. I know this is an American team, but think about it: doesn't disliking soccer make me more of an American? Riiiight - I knew you'd see it my way. Simple thing #3 that I enjoy: Big lottery jackpots. MegaMillions draws tonight, with a single winner cashing an estimated $363 million. (Only a measly $259M in a lump sum...and probably an anemic $125M after taxes.) I'm no lottery junkie. Personally, I'd rather bet on sports. But I do like to purchase a ticket when the jackpot goes over $100 million. As my friend said once, "It's worth a dollar just to take a moment to dream what you would do with the money." That statement may sound corny or pathetic to some, but I related with it right away. People do all sorts of things in life for an escape. We go on a vacation for a week, or just sneak off for one of those "Calgon, take me away" baths, drink beer, take meth, go for a jog, eat a candy bar, or see a movie. All are various forms of escape from everyday life. Taking a moment to dream of having a virtually unlimited budget is one of my little guilty pleasures. You'd better believe it involves me having a great card collection too! Simple thing #4 that I enjoy: Sporting event tickets being redeemable for food if the team meets certain requirements. This happened just last night in the Raptors-Magic game and it made SportsCenter. Apparently at Toronto games, whenever the Raptors notch 100 points or more, all the fans can redeem their tickets at Pizza Pizza! for a free slice of pizza. Lovely! And last night, the Raptors broke into triple-digits with only two seconds left, making for a very anxious, and then happy, crowd. Who doesn't enjoy that? I'll tell you who - Orlando coach Stan Van Gundy, whose team incidentally won the game anyway. Read all about it here. And watch the fan excitement here! --> (BTW, I find it ridiculous that Van Gundy doesn't enjoy this promotion. All we need to see is his silhouette to know the man has enjoyed his share [and my share and your share] of pizza in his life. He probably uses two slices to make a bun for his breakfast double-cheeseburger.) I have my own exciting story about this too. It reads like one of those stories someone "mis-remembers" from their childhood, chalk full of drama and exaggeration, so I found the box score to make sure my memory was accurate. I went to the above-linked game with my dad and sister. Check out not only the box score, not that it was extra innings, but what happened in the bottom of the 9th. The Cubs were down 6-4 with 2 outs. It doesn't have the count, but I remember that twos were wild on the scoreboard: 2 balls, 2 strikes, 2 outs. With one man on, yet only one strike away from defeat, Andre Dawson cranked one to tie it up. A 9-year-old doesn't forget moments like that. (And unfortunately, a 30-something year old man is pained to see a childhood favorite go into the HOF in a different team's uniform.) But anyway, there is more to this story. My sister was 6 at the time, and due to coldness and her general boredom, we had to leave the park and go home not long after that home run. For whatever reason, we didn't listen to the game in the car, so when we returned home, I was anxious to flip on the TV to see what had happened. To my surprise, the game was still on, so I got to see the end anyway. Cubs win, 7-6! Oh but wait - it gets better. That's right, it was a promotional day where if the Cubs met two requirements, everyone could cash in their tickets for something... Requirements: 1) Cubs win 2) Cubs score 7 or 11 runs And your ticket got you... a free Slurpee!! Oh joy! 9th inning heroics, Cubs win, and a free Slurpee. Is there much better when you're 9 years old? I think not. Have fun! -T You can now find me all over the web:  Like Monster Cards on Facebook
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Inside My Brain